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Wednesday, August 13, 2014

WTH Wednesday or Save the Hot Pocket!!!

Yep- WTH Wednesday!
(Most of the events in this post actually took place on a Tuesday- but I was too tired and too busy to get on here!) So I am declaring this a WTH Wednesday post! 

I have been watching all the posts on {insert social media name here} about going back to school and I love it! I love seeing all the rooms and decor! And I love seeing how excited everyone is to go back. I have been in a few rooms that look like they are straight off of Pinterest and one that could have been on a iFunny. Yikes.
 
Needless to say we are in full swing here at the Squirrels household! 
With my schedule being very different this year, I have had to set new and more stringent guidelines for getting out of the house in the morning.
WTH? 
WHY, WHY, WHY is it so hard to get them to understand that they have to move at a reasonable pace?
Why the heck are there fifty-eleven alarms set? For three people?? 
The halls start sounding like some jerk set every alarm at Radio Shack 1 minute apart around 5:30am! There are iphone alarms, iPad alarms, iPod alarms, oh- and a few ALARM CLOCK alarms, too! 
Hopefully the routine will set in quickly.
 
I've got the Littlest Little showing me what he is going to wear the night before so that I can be sure they are at least clothes that are suitable for outside wear.
I've had him place his "Deo for the B.O." next to his toothbrush-
 
"Dear Lord, please make sure he remembers to brush each day. And if not everyday, then at least M-F, cause I used to work at his school and I don't want people talking about my smelly kid with the butter teeth.
Amen."

We are all walking out the door right at the same time most mornings. I have told them that there is absolutely NO FIGHTING in the a.m.!! They can pummel the crap out of each other when they get off the bus, but if any one of them makes us late in the morning, they are ALL grounded! So they need to form a bond. Quickly.

I guess I shouldn't give so much leniency for after school- for it is in the mere minutes of After School Bliss that the story I am about to share takes place. (Also the inspiration for bringing back my WTH Wednesday)! 

I was at a high school yesterday, so I was home fairly early. I got here right before they got off of the bus.  So I did the obligatory "How was your day? Let me see your planner spiel" with all of them. (When it's time for stuff like that, it feels like I have 37 Littles and not just 3!)
It's right around this time that they all start squawking like little birds that they are starving. All of them choose something different, of course, and that is when I inform them that they are all on their own.
I'm chatting it up at the table with the boys and Chickadee (who at this point has made her after school snack - a hot pocket- and then retreated to her den) comes up to get something to drink. We are all laughing and joking around- being silly- (imagine that) when she takes off through the living room and down the hall.

(Insert slow motion footage)

There was a laugh, a screech, and then a THUD!

The laugh was when she realized that our sweet little Barkley might be in her room enjoying her hot pocket that she left unattended to come get her drink.
The screech was the noise she made when she tripped WHILE RUNNING down the hall. Her speed was too great and she was not able to stop as she rounded the corner- so she stopped herself with her body.
That was the "Thud".
Her hand slammed into the corner of the wall.

(Resume regular speed).

So this is where we are now.
 
Yes, that's right, Chickadee, look away. Look away.

Yep. One Urgent Care Clinic visit, a few xrays, and a thumb splint later, this is where we are.

WTH?! Have I not been telling you for the last 17 years to NOT run in the house? Has this not ALWAYS been a rule? And why would you leave your hot pocket on your bed?? That makes it fair game for Barkley!
We are in the little room at the Dr.'s office and here my beautiful, seemingly intelligent daughter is telling the Dr that she thinks she broke her hand.
 "How did it happen?" (I always hate it when they talk directly to the kids- I am always afraid they are going to say some "buzz word" that will trigger the Dr. to push a panic button and send in the DHS SWAT)!
But I dodged that scenario when my ding dong doodle daddy of a daughter replied:
"I was trying to save my hot pocket."

The good news is - no fractures. We go BACK to the Dr on Friday. They think she may have torn ligaments. I don't even know what that means. One of my friends said it might involve physical therapy for rehab. ?!?!?!?!
Are you kidding me?
Because of a hot pocket?

I told her I was going to make a poster that said NO RUNNING and put her on it then tack it to the end of the hall. Who would have thought that I was still going to have to remind them all of that rule this far into the game?

I think we must all take a moment to acknowledge that, while it was originally thought that this guy was a Guilty Gus and up to no good with his hot pocket thievery antics, he was in no way charged with any crime in this matter. He continues to roam freely through the bedrooms, scavenging for hot pocket crumbs.

 
{No hot pockets were harmed in the making of this post.}

5 comments:

  1. Hahaha! This post made me laugh. I love your daughter's response, "I was trying to save my hot pocket." Too funny. Reminds me when I was 14 and broke my collar bone by jumping and diving in a ditch. So embarrassing when the doctor asks you how it happened. lol. Enjoy the rest of your week! :)

    Amanda
    First Grade Garden

    ReplyDelete
  2. You seriously made me laugh out loud. Love how hilarious your family posts can be!
    Catherine
    First Grade Top Dogs<br

    ReplyDelete

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